Personal Blessings of Social Media

I have spent a lot of energy focusing on all the negatives of social media so I wanted to mention all the blessing that came to me through social media - all the reasons I wouldn't be where I am without it.

YouTube lead me into the greater world of music. Here I found many of my favourite songs and created my own style from the easy access to music that YouTube provides. My main reason for YouTube is to listen to music. There are many other tools that one can listen to music on but the way YouTube is set up it is the most convenient and effective for finding music you may like but don't know of yet. I can search a song I already like, find other songs that are related to my chosen one, and search through playlists with songs that I already like and songs that people with similar music tastes introduce me to. It is here that my nail art passion was kindled and grew like fire. I started watching tutorials on how to do different designs and quickly became obsessed with nail art. I found a hobby that I didn't even know about. I learnt so many tricks and became pretty good to the point that I could have started up my own little business but decided against so. YouTube really opened me up to new ideas and new possibilities. I could extend myself beyond what I could without it by recreating and adapting ideas from those on YouTube. As I got better and better, receiving compliments and been provided with opportunities to do other girls' nails my sense of competence increased significantly. I found something that I was truly good at.

Facebook linked me to my friends from all over the world. I come from a place that isn't very eventful so people are constantly leaving. I travel a bit too so being able to stay in contact with all my friends is very difficult. Thank goodness for Facebook, which allows me to stay connected, even to strengthen my relationships. Through Facebook I kept the friendships that might otherwise have withered over time. I am able to reach the ones I miss dearly such as family. Facebook is my key to home. I can feel a slice of home when I talk to people I used to see all the time. It fulfills my need for relatedness while I feel so alone, being so far away.

Finally, Instagram and Pinterest, they allow me to share my experiences through photos. I can bring those not with me on my journey around the world as though they were right here with me.

The Cunning of Social Media

"If you're not paying for it, you're the product."

I can't say that I entirely understand this product but fro what I do understand of this powerful statement is enough to awaken me to a sort of reality of the workings of social media. I always expected something like Facebook to be free and when there were rumors concerning they possibility of having to pay for Facebook I was greatly upset by that. It was discussed in our class today what an effect such as that would have had. The use and popularity of Facebook would have decreased incredibly to the point where they probably wouldn't be making vey much if any money. No matter how addictive it may be and useful it is people aren't likely going to be on it if they have to pay. Furthermore, even if one was willing to pay their friends may not be so willing thus decreasing the need for it. Social media companies are very smart in keeping things free. But I still always wondered how it is that they are getting their money. Then I remember all the annoying advertisements and game invitations and I see how easily they must make money. With such an increasing number of people on Facebook who wouldn't want there ads on there? In a way we are the product because companies are trying to buy our attention. We give all our information to these sites who have the right (for the more part) to access it and do with it as they will. We are all part of their produce in a sense. That's how I see it and to me this is concerning.

I loved the discussions we had today when a professor brought up the effectiveness of an advertisement if you don't know that it's an advertisement. This is very true because I know that in New Zealand I come across this a lot. I find their ads so entertaining and I would watch them in my free time. I didn't realize what was so catchy and effective about them till now: The advertisement doesn't draw any attention to the product, until right near the end and they don't come across as selling something. It's just an entertaining story that's usually relatable or just humorous and then at the end we find out the connection to whatever product is being sold, but only for a small moment. Social media does this very effectively at times, especially on YouTube. For the more part I get so absorbed by the end that I unintentionally watch the whole thing only to find out in the end that it wasn't just some inspirational story but it was really an advertisement. Dove, for example, usually does an amazing job at this.

The Conflict between Sharing and Privacy

The YouTube link I posted on Facebook 'The Social Media Experiment' has got me thinking...

We all favor privacy. With the knowledge of the bad things that happen in the world as a result of the poor decisions and behaviors of others we don't often trust other people, for justified reasons. Since everyone is imperfect and thus all subject to dishonesty we would never post our personal bank details on a social media site if we valued our money and sustenance. We know the risk in that but what about the risk in posting photos? Schedules? Locations? The latter, most especially, gives anyone connected to social media the ability to find you wherever you are, as the man in the Social Media Experiment demonstrated. These things don't seem so "personal" to us but from watching this video we can see how just how much information one can gather from merely stalking social media profiles.

A man at the end of the video threatened to the call the police if they tried to "invade [his] privacy" again. It is quite ironic how this man is so willing to post this information, clearly has not adjusting his social media settings to allow for more privacy, yet claims that his "privacy" has been "invaded". I can understand where he is coming from, because if I had been in their position I certainly would have been freaked out, but this guy seemed to miss the whole point in the experiment. He didn't realise that maybe he was doing something wrong not the experimenter. Yes, the experiment was on the creepy side but no less real. The experimenter only showed this man what people can do in social media stalking, without even hacking into anything.

Here is my message: Reconsider posting anything that you would not be comfortable with a stranger knowing about you. If you feel a real need to be a little more personal, make your social media profiles as private as possible. You are using the internet. Remember, the internet is available to the world.http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5P_0s1TYpJU

Satisfying our Needs

Facebook has always a really negative connotation for me. Mainly because of it's addictive qualities. Other than that I have had many great past times that were spent on Facebook and other social media like Skype, Windows messenger, Bebo and Snapchat. Saying that social media was a favourite pastime seems a degrading claim but it's not as anti-social as it sounds, in fact it was quite the opposite. For the most part of my life I probably could have done without these social media tools because all the people I needed to talk to were a part of my daily life and interactions anyway. This changed a lot when a started gaining friends who lived far away, but most especially when I moved countries. I can confidently say that if it weren't for social media I would not be friends with some of the people that are now an enormous part of my life. No, I did not meet these people online. I did however form unique friendships that I otherwise would not have. 

I have one instance where I went to an EFY and met this guy who I didn't speak much to but when I did I was really engaged in our conversation. We parted ways, likely to never talk again, that is if we didn't have Facebook. We communicated on Facebook for weeks after, then on Skype, and sometimes even through email. This communication lasted months before we planned to meet up again. In the three years that I have known my best friend we have only been in the same city for a total of 1.5 months. This friendship would not even have started, let alone, developed had it not been for social media. He is now my best friend and satisfying one of those three basic psychological needs in me – Relatedness. He and many other of my friends satisfy this need by keeping the relationship going even in physical absence. 

The times I cherish while using social media have not been times that I scrolled endlessly through the news feed to admire the lives of others, or times that I looked through entire photo albums on other peoples pages – these are the times I regret. The times I remember and times that I wouldn’t take back were hilarious conversations, deep personal conversations, shared links that had left a lasting impression and many more interactions. It’s true, like the Psychological study suggested that for the most part I scroll through Facebook expressionless, but whenever I am communicating with friends and family it is obvious that I am doing more than just typing. I am socializing in a way because my emotions are heightened, my facial expressions change constantly, I’m often given strange looks for my facial expressions in response to something a friend said and I find myself laughing out loud, not just in text. All-in-all I am actually very grateful for these social media tools. I know I would not have known any better had I never had them, but even knowing the consequences those come more so as a result of my lack of self-will to restrain myself. I know I can use social media in an effective and beneficial way if I am careful.

Confessions of a Facebook Addict

In our Psychology classes we have been talking much along the lines of the negative influences of social media and after a lecture by Dr. Steffensen on the Psychology of Addiction I have begun to think of the psychological aspects of social media, specifically why it is addictive.

I confess to be a huge Facebook addict; furthermore, I am an addict of almost any social media. It all started with 'Bebo', which I joined around the age of 12. Looking back I highly regret ever creating an account with that site. I was hugely addicted. I would spend hours upon hours adjusting my profile, looking at other people's profiles and following their lives and talking to other people. After a long time on the site I would have accomplished just about nothing and learnt only regret. The experienced that changed my view towards social media didn't come until one day when I had one of my best friends over after school to hang out. I made the initial mistake of logging into my Bebo account and from there I spent over an hour while she sat there with me, just watching as I became absorbed into this site, completely uninterested in her presence at the time. My mother eventually came over to me and told me to get off because I was being such a horrible friend and that's when I realized my best friend had left a long time ago and was playing with my younger siblings, waiting for me. I felt so embarrassed and so ashamed, but even this experience wasn't enough to stop my habits. It helped me identify the problem but when it comes to addictions identifying the problem isn't the problem. People become addicted, know they're addicted, even desperately want to stop the behavior but they can't. I wouldn't say social media is the most harmful addictions but it is most definitely an addiction. Once I was banned from Bebo by my parents I refused to join Facebook and kept away from it for a long time despite the pressures of my friends. However, I finally joined because I wanted to get photo's from a Volleyball tournament I attended and the easiest way to get them was off Facebook, so I joined. I mostly regret it since then.

In my opinion, social media is one of those things that you know you can live happily and peacefully without but once you have it, it is very hard to back away. It's almost like when you finally get a microwave and then having to get rid of it. You used to be able to live without it but now that you've experienced all the benefits that come from it you can't let it go because you will lose so much that you had. Facebook keeps us connected to people on a daily basis, those that we otherwise may not have. It's these qualities that turn social media into a "necessity". We have a basic psychological need for affiliation and this fulfills this need in many ways. I accordance with these need we also seem to crave efficiency. A large portion of the world is set on making things more convenient, more accessible, and with less effort. Facebook, and other social medias give us that.

Enhancing Thought Processes

I'm not usually in support of social media. As much as I rely on it and as addictive I find it I can't disqualify it for the benefits it provides. A discussion in my Psychology of Social Media class stirred up this argument within myself of whether social media takes away our tendency to ponder and study questions out in our mind before turning to Google for the answer. Others argued that social media, namely search engines such as Google, take away the thought processes of trying to figure things out for ourselves, that it is making us lazy. This time I have to disagree. I wouldn't say that social media necessarily replaces or eliminates the thought process. I think that, in a way, it furthers it. It's hard for me to explain, but let me attempt so now. 

Say we didn't have technology, internet, and social media and you had a general question that came to you and you wanted to know the answer. You would probably think about it, try to figure it out for yourself, maybe ask someone who you believe knows more, then what? Usually, if you had not formulated an answer by then it would end there (unless you were really determined).You question is either answered or it isn't and you think no more of it. Now, back to today’s world, say you have the same question. You think about it, maybe you ask someone else or maybe you just skip straight to Google, because Google has all the answers right? However, it doesn't end there. Google may answer your question, may it won’t, and maybe it will just open up even more questions. 

See, my point is that Google, or social media, doesn't always limit your thinking or strip your creativity; sometimes it enhances it. I find that when I have questions I am motivated to figure it out for myself first, because I enjoy the challenge. Then I have the amazing opportunity to search it online and am provide with many different answers that I have to filter through. Commonly, what happens is that I spend a lot more time pondering, researching and possibly even learning about that which I otherwise would not have had the opportunity of doing so. I’m sure I’m no exception. Yes, I would agree that social media makes us lazy sometimes, but I think it’s important to remember that there is always a balance and social media can always induce more thinking, and more growth.

The Answer or the Problem?

That seems to be the debate of our generation. I think that as much as we love our social media, and as attached to them as we get, we realize the hurt accompanied. I do not deny the amazing benefits that we receive from social media. We are able to keep connections with people on the other side of the world, we can get messages to other people quicker and without having to travel and find them, and we have resources available to us that otherwise would not be so. The list continues with the invention and improvement of each new social media. Still, I can't help but believe that horrific consequences of social media are yet to come. 

"It must needs be, that there is an opposition in all things" (2 Nephi 2:11, Book of Mormon)

We can list a seemingly incredible number of benefits but with these good consequences must come the bad ones. The question is not whether social media is the answer to our problems, or the problem requiring an answer, but rather it is a matter of 'do the positives outweigh the negatives?' I am very quick to tell people about my detest for Facebook, how it is so addictive, time-consuming, wasteful, pointless, and unsociable, but I dare not delete my account. In fact, I use Facebook almost everyday, several times a day. I often justify this behavior as addiction but even when I have gone a long time without using it I realize why I so often return - Communication. Facebook provides an opportunity for me to regularly keep contact with friends and family over four thousand miles away. Sometimes I need to talk to my family, discussing school or financial affairs, and other times I simply miss them and it's almost as if I can return to them through the internet. I rely heavily upon this for my financial, academic and psychological well-being.

Now, we can see, there isn't a black and white answer.